Halloween Sleep Over VS Hotel Stay?

 Good Morning!

I'm grateful to be waking up healthy today.

Every morning I wake up and find something to be grateful for.

So yesterday was Halloween 2020.  This has been quite a year.  

I moved to Coral Gables from South Beach, Miami, FL after some research of the world to find the best place for me.  I am very happy here.  I live quite close to the Miracle Mile, and so I really don't need a car here, as I really didn't need or have one in South Beach for 5 years, but I decided to get one to help me get around quicker since I have also joined a real estate group here, & started a new business!! 

Click here to learn more:  LivingTracy

Yesterday, I dressed up in a Lifeguard costume, in honor of Halloween.  I walked down to the Miracle Mile at Bulla, and took a seat at the open air bar to get some work done.  

(Better than working at home alone, I decided.)  

So I order tonic water and lime, and then croquettes, and then soup, and finally calamari.

While there working, I started getting messages from someone whom I had connected with on a dating site.  For fun, I met someone at the bar who created a fun "Baywatch-ish video that you can see on my facebook page @LivingTracy Real Estate and instagram that I sent him.  He responded by sending me recent videos of him in Egypt  & Dubai.  This guy was starting to look really interesting.

I really haven't had much time for dating, as my goal and priority now, in this time in my life is to help people reach THEIR goals and dreams through buying, selling and investing in real estate.  However, this being a holiday weekend, I thought having a date might make it a little more fun,

So on a whim, this man, we'll call him Palm Beach guy, decided to hop in the shower, at 5:30pm, and take a drive to Coral Gables and take me out, which I also encouraged him to do!  

I had a few invitations to parties, but no concrete plans.  

I was very careful to not disillusion him into thinking this was going to be a "sleep-over" first date.  

I told him about a guy from Naples/Marco Island (a friend of my girlfriend), who had just come this week, on Wednesday, and stayed at the Colonnade Hotel in Coral Gables when he came to town just to meet me, see my girlfriend and take us out, & said it was very nice, and not too expensive.  

However, PB guy said he had family here he could easily stay with.

PB guy said he'd be here in an hour and 40 minutes, so I decided to go home and make a costume change & freshen up to liven things up a bit!  We spoke as he was starting his drive, and he said that he had not spoken to his family yet nor made reservations at a nearby hotel.  This alarmed me, so again, I encouraged him to do this during his long drive, as I wanted to make sure that he wouldn't need to drive home after drinking, I told him.  

Honestly, though, I've been in this situation before, if you've read any of my other blogs, and it ruins the night to have to end it when my date has had a misunderstanding of how the date will end.  

So I am devoted to now being crystal clear.  

When he arrived in his Cadillac SUV, it was raining, and he had a little trouble figuring out where to pick me up, but finally I hopped in the car.  I noticed that he just kept saying that he was in an SUV...not mentioning it was the Cadillac that kept passing me on the street, but I noted & thought this was kind of humble of him.

When I got in the car, I noticed that Palm Beach guy looked a little older than he'd looked on the videos that he'd sent to me before our in person meeting.  Throughout the night he again stated he was 56, but I really thought he seemed much older than my 52 years.  He also was already drinking.  Offered me some, which I declined, but truly after the misunderstanding with the pick-up & standing in the rain watching him pass me, I told him that I was ready for a drink at a nice quiet place.  

I wanted to get to know this man who had driven all this way to meet me.

We, or I, decided to forgo the Halloween Parties immediately.  It was hot and I knew it would be loud.  I wanted to sit down & get to know this guy..."give him a chance," as my girlfriend is always telling me.  So I directed him to take me to Flemings on the Miracle Mile, very close, and altho the lady on the phone said they were "fully committed" for dinner reservations, they had tables available in the lounge.  Perfect.  I prefer to sit in the lounge anyway!

PB Guy valeted the car, and we went inside for dinner, which we had agreed, just would be a bite, as neither of us were that hungry.  He kept telling me that he was really relaxed, and we could do or go wherever I wanted.  He just was looking forward to seeing the area he said.

One of my girlfriends called from one of the parties that I'd been invited to & confirmed that it was a stand around the bar kinda party in an open air bar, but on a steamy hot night Miami night.

Our dinner included 3 appetizers that he chose, (I told him that I'd just finished a calamari, but he ordered it anyway, as I told him that was fine), and while he drank Jack and Coke, I chose the red wine they had on special price, after he allowed me to try his.  PB Guy was full of stories.  Sounded like he used to be quite a guy.  Went to West Point. Lost his father in the military very young.  He was raised by an abusive step father, who has since passed.  

PB Guy is super smart with a very high IQ, & I noticed wears a beautiful solid Gold Ferragamo watch.

He said a couple of times that he was doing all of the talking, & he caught me yawning once.  

PB Guy said he thought he was "boring" me.  

Although in this situation when my date appears more interested in himself than me & is sharing so much of his past, I really would rather listen than share anything of mine.  

I always find myself wondering when this happens: 

"Is he nervous?  Is this why he is dominating the conversation with stories of his life?  Does he really like me...is that why he is sharing so much of himself?"  And finally, "Has he done anything wonderful LATELY??  Or is it all a historical remembrance?"

Anyway, with this, he noticed that I didn't eat much, and asked if I wanted anything more at the table and again as we waited for his car.  I would have loved a steak instead of the bar food, but we both agreed when we started that we weren't hungry enough for both, and he seemed to really want the bar food, after I, and then the waiter read him the menu, because he "forgot" his glasses, which made me really concerned about his driving.  However, he said that he just had trouble reading texts & menus.😐

Then, Palm Beach Guy kept noticing that my phone was lighting up.  

I told him, "don't worry, it is just my family chat with my brothers & sisters, Dad and their kids."  He told me to go ahead and read it...I told him that I'd missed 16 messages, which was unusual.  I read the messages, and then noticed the final photo...it was a man walking through a war zone, and said that is what "voting in 2020 is like vs voting in 2016."  I laughed & showed him.  

With this a mini political argument started.  I had not realized that we had differing political opinions.  I thought, "why does this keep happening to me!?"  With my dating profile, I always post my political preference, not because it is a problem for me, but because I've found it can be a problem on dates who have a different one.😞  As my mother once said about race, "it is hard enough to connect with someone who is the same, better not" to throw another obstacle in the ring!

At first then, I thought to myself..."Should the date just end here?"  I was good to just walk home.

And then realizing that he still wanted to see more of the Gables, 

and he did drive a long way to get here.

I made the executive decision, as he put the power in my hands, to show him 1 more place that I thought would have a fun Miami Halloween vibe and music: Copper 29, not far away.

Palm Beach Guy decided to move the car, for which I was grateful, because as it is a short walk, it was slippery after the rain, and I just didn't feel up to it.

We walked the short walk from the parking garage and walked in to Copper 29.  

We passed another fun looking place, but I urged Palm Beach Guy to keep walking after he paused there, and I almost lost him!  I told him to keep walking, as 

"You will like this one better.  We need to get there early if we are going to have a chance of sitting down."

Sure enough, we walked in, it was decked out and decorated in Halloween garb, and the music was fun danceable sounds.  All the bar stools were taken, but as we slowly walked down the bar and stood next to a couple stools that were empty, but apparently being saved.  

The first one was being saved by a guy for a guy who returned and confirmed he wasn't going to give it up for the likes of me...even though most of the time he was standing.

The second available seat was being saved for a younger woman, who returned, took one look at me, and graciously offered it to me.  I learned this woman's name was Andrea.  Andrea said she loved me, and we were going to be friends!  We both agreed that we could just instantly feel a chemistry between us.  

Funny, same thing happened last time I was here, and met a wonderful woman waiting for the bathroom, who now wants to join my real estate group!!

PB Guy asked me to order 2 drinks for us, as he said I appeared to know people there and could get service faster.  I ordered us both Espresso Martinis.  We started making friends with the group around us.  Andrea was just beautiful, and had just met the guy she was with too, she told me.  Though they appeared to be getting along a lot better, and were friendlier, Andrea said she was about ready to leave because it was getting full, and she lives with her grandparents and is wary of Covid. 

I went to the bathroom and when I came back Andrea's date told me that I shouldn't make my date drive all the way back to Palm Beach.  He said it a couple of times, and loud enough for the whole group to hear.  I was thinking, "WHAT DID THIS GUY SAY?"  Now it was MY RESPONSIBILITY that this grown man has not made after-drinking plans for himself?  

I did not respond, but Andrea looked at me with a look of support, and a basic, "I gotcha girl!"

Andrea said again, we have a lot to talk about! We WILL get together SOON!!

PB Guy ordered us 2 more drinks and we all kept having fun until it immediately stopped.  Andrea and her date disappeared. The other handsome young guy started making out with his date and dancing, and then PB Guy said to me that he was leaving...was I going to stay?  At first I told him No, after feeling the affects of the liquor and knowing that I needed no more.  But then seeing that we were all still having fun, I thought maybe I could stay a little while more?  It was only 10:30pm.

Then everyone instantly disappeared except the hot young guy making out & dirty dancing with his girlfriend, and around me were a bunch of people that I did not recognize.

I sat there drinking water, watching the crowd, and considering if I would walk home 

or order a car?

Then suddenly my date came back and asked me if I was ready to leave.  

(I guess he couldn't find the car!)😐

I told him that I was, and he kindly dropped me off at home, I thanked him & kissed him on the cheek, which he seemed disappointed with, got out of the car and asked him to text me when he got home or wherever he was going safely.

I came inside and went immediately to bed...When I woke up this morning, I received a text from PB Guy:  "Thanks for your invitation to stay--Not."  

And then he thought I was "Rude" for not inviting him in to stay the night.😟

Wow, there you have it!

Nothing kills a date more than when it's with someone who doesn't have enough respect for a woman to allow it to end gracefully.

Hence my decision to focus on real estate right now instead of dating!!!

After-thought from a romantic: 

It was actually Randi's respectful gentleman friend who restored my faith in men enough to want to try again with a date last night.  Still hopeful, but thinking my attention is better placed elsewhere than on dating right now in my life.